hi all : ) im happy but horribly fat. today was horrible i already ran but im going to go to a workout tape hah

think thin

current weight is 124 : ( the other day i weighed 122 i havent eaten anything yet i know my mother is going to force food down me i think im going to ahve a yogurt?? i dont know im confused this sucks if i eat the yogurt she wont bug me about it but if i dont i will lie n she wont believe me n i might binge later because im hungry gasp this is killing me lol

i hope today is good, good luck everyone

Current Location: kitchen/tv room
Current Mood: contemplative

where is everyone? its lunch time and im dieing i want to eat a hot dog lol but they are so high in fat uh i don't know wat to do

i was reading a magazine and it said nicole richie needs to gain at least 40 pounds to nourish her baby i think she looks fine, and very healthy 20 years ago most women only gained about 30 pounds when they got pregnant but now people gain like 60 thats disgusting

how is everyone else doing? i hope i can stay strong

yesterday i weighed 123 today i weigh 124 : / yuck i have to get down to 115 at least the other day i was like if i dont lose any weight i will be fine my bodys not that bad but since then i cant stop thining about wat i eat i am disgusted with my body my stomach is GROSSS uh i hope i dont eat anymore today

woke up. went for a run. felt amazingly skinny ate 5 grapes a gogurt and water my mom took me out to breakfast i had two huge pancakes 1 and a half cups of coffee some bacon blaaaah so gross n later im sleeping over my friends where everyone eats tons of food i could choose not to sleepover but i still want to see my friends uhhh life sucks lol and its raining! AND i am fat : (

Current Mood: depressed

iate soe much today and my mom is ordering a pizza soon i think :( uhhh and i have to run its getting late i dont want to run but i have to today = fat i hope tomorrow is better my summer goal is to get to 115 i can do it i know i can thats still not even that skinny uhhh whatever lol ok im going to go run


pace

hola! i havent been on in so long how is everyone? i weigh 125 i want to be 115 i feel very very fat i just got back from camp n i cant control wat i eat.  everything was scheduled at camp, like the meals but all day i just keep eating todays been horrible and i miss camp im going for a run soon

Current Mood: crappy

ah im so confused? can anyone read this or is like my personal journal?

a boy just called me a bubblebee??? : ( 

i have lymes? will that make me lose weight? i havent posted in a few days i feel so disgustingly fat

is this right? i need help im so fat uhhh its so fucking gross i feel bad for my boyfriend im not seeing him all summer ill see him in september i want to be skinny for him i want him to love me

i want to be beautiful for him
i feel so fat i can sort of feel my ribs i want to feel my hip bones really bad i want to lose i need to lose

how is everyone?

my ribs are sticking out more and it makes me really happy my hips are still repulsive though its coming off too slowly i have to work harder my body disgusts me
im so thirsty even drinking water makes me feel heavy a friend once told me it makes u look skinny but i feel like it poofs out my stomach 

i dont feel hungry i feel fat i want to be thin

*hunger hurts starving works* is that the right saying??